Messenger madness
by Helen N
Summary: The Shaman King characters have discovered the magic of Messenger and now they’re trying to hook Horo and Ren up! God protect us all of what may happen next! HoroxRen
1. Chapter 1

**Messenger madness**

**Chapter 1**

**Horo's lesson: Never underestimate Ren **

**A/N:** Hello all you Shaman King fans! I know this kind of fics aren't at all original, but I had some funny ideas, and I really wanted to write a HoroxRen fic so I decided to give it a try :). It's not beta-ed so please don't be mad at me if there are any grammatical mistakes. This fic will go on until Horo and Ren go together, but I don't intend to make it mote than 3-4 chapters… Oh, and please don't forget to review after you read it to tell me what you think! You can even give me some suggestions if you want :).

**Messenger IDs: **

**Yoh – SlackerBoy69 **

**Ren – ChineseShaman**

**Horohoro - ImTheBossDude**

**Hao – FutureShamanKing**

**Manta – BookWorm4U**

**Ryu – JapaneseCasanova**

**Lyserg – BritishAvenger**

**Chocolove – No1Comedian **

**Anna – YourNightmare**

**Pirika – TheGirlNextDoor**

**Tamao – SweetTamao**

**Summary: **The Shaman King characters have discovered the magic of Messenger and now they're trying to hook Horo and Ren up! God protect us all of what may happen next! HoroxRen

**SlackerBoy69 has joined the chatroom.**

**ImTheBossDude has joined the chatroom.**

**SlackerBoy69: **Horo?

**ImTheBossDude:** Yoh!

**ImTheBossDude:** What a discrete name…

**SlackerBoy69**: Look who's talking!

**ImTheBossDude**: Hmph.

**ImTheBossDude**: Where's Ren?

**SlackerBoy69:** Dunno. He said He'd be here.

**ImTheBossDude**: He's probably drinking some more milk. God, please let him choke with it!

**SlackerBoy69:** Horo!

**TheGirlNextDoor has joined the chatroom.**

**TheGirlNextDoor:** Hello!

**TheGirlNextDoor: **Let me guess: Onii-chan and Yoh?

**SlackerBoy69:** How did you know?

**ChineseShaman has joined the chatroom.**

**ImTheBossDude:** Yoh, shut up, or you'll make yourself look like a baka!

**ChineseShaman:** Who dares use my phrases in my presence?!

**ImTheBossDude:** Pirika.

**TheGirlNextDoor: **Hey!

**ChineseShaman: **Horohoro, is that you?

**ImTheBossDude: **No, he's out for lunch.

**ChineseShaman: **It's morning.

**ImTheBossDude: **It's healthy to eat early meals.

**ChineseShaman: **-glares-

**ImTheBossDude: **Okay, okay, it's me. What are you going to do, kill me?

**ChineseShaman: **-smirks- Don't underestimate me.

**ImTheBossDude:** Yeah, sure, like you can harm me while I'm in my house…

**ChineseShaman:** Was that a challenge?

**ImTheBossDude:** You becha!

**ChineseShaman: **Very well then.

**ChineseShaman has left the chatroom.**

**ImTheBossDude:** He wasn't serious, was he?

**SlackerBoy69:** Now you're asking…?

**ImTheBossDude:** Well I was so caught up in arguing that I didn't think about it…

**TheGirlNextDoor:** Like you ever do…

**ImTheBossDude:** Hey, I heard you!

**TheGirlNextDoor: **I don't think that's quite possible…

**ImTheBossDude:** Why not?

**SlackerBoy69:** Why not?

**TheGirlNextDoor:** Ahhh! You two are so thick! I'm out of here!

**TheGirlNextDoor has left the chatroom.**

**ImTheBossDude:** Good riddance!

**SlackerBoy69:** But what did she mean by that?

**ImTheBossDude:** …

**ImTheBossDude:** And they call me stupid…

**SlackerBoy69:** Hmph.

**SlackerBoy69:** Stop teasing me or I'll tell you know who you know what!

**ImTheBossDude:** No! Anything but that!

**ImTheBossDude:** Who's you know who and what's you know what?

**SlackerBoy69:** And you call _me_ stupid…

**SlackerBoy69:** I'll tell Ren that you like him…

**ImTheBossDude:** Oh, no, you won't!

**ImTheBossDude:** Or I'll tell Anna that you found a way to slack off at her trainings!

**SlackerBoy69:** Horo, my best friend, you know I was just kidding, don't you?

**ImTheBossDude:** -rolls eyes-

**SlackerBoy69:** Anyway, why don't you just tell him?

**ImTheBossDude:** WHAT?

**ImTheBossDude:** You have to be kidding! I still want to live, thank you very much.

**SlackerBoy69:** Come on, Horo, he can't be that bad!

**ImTheBossDude:** Didn't you hear me? He's not bad, he's hell!

**YourNightmare has joined the chatroom.**

**SlackerBoy69:** Ah, come on, he can't be worse than Anna!

**YourNightmare:** What?

**SlackerBoy69:** Ooops!

**YourNightmare: **I'll get you for that!

**YourNightmare has left the chatroom.**

**SlackerBoy69:** OMG! OMG! She's coming! Help me!

**ImTheBossDude:** Good luck!

**SlackerBoy69:** Horoooo!

**SlackerBoy69 has left the chatroom.**

**ImTheBossDude:** Good! He left.

**ImTheBossDude: **But now I'm all alone…

**ImTheBossDude:** Why am I talking all alone?

**BritishAvenger has joined the chatroom.**

**ImTheBossDude:** Lyserg! I'm glad you're here!

**BritishAvenger:** How did you know it was me?

**ImTheBossDude:** Um… It's kind of obvious…

**BritishAvenger:** What?

**ImTheBossDude:** Your username says it all.

**BritishAvenger:** Oh, no! Now I have to change it!

**BritishAvenger:** And it took me two hours to think of it!

**ImTheBossDude: **Why would you change it? It's not bad, it suits you.

**BritishAvenger:** That's the problem! I don't want anyone to recognize me!

**ImTheBossDude:** Um… why?

**BritishAvenger:** So I can attack Hao when he's not expecting it!

**ImTheBossDude:** … Hao has internet???

**BritishAvenger:** Yes…

**ImTheBossDude:** That's … odd…

**BritishAvenger: **Never mind that.

**BritishAvenger: **How are things between you and Ren?

**ImTheBossDude:** Excuse me?

**BritishAvenger:** You know, you two being together and all…

**ImTheBossDude:** WHAT??? We're not together!

**BritishAvenger:** Really?

**BritishAvenger:** I could have swore you were.

**ImTheBossDude:** Why would you think such a thing? It's disgusting!

**BritishAvenger: **Well the sexual frustration is so thick you could cut it with a knife!

**No1Comedian has joined the chatroom.**

**BritishAvenger:** Really, you two need to hook up!

**No1Comedian: **Who with whom?

**ImTheBossDude:** Nobody.

**BritishAvenger:** Horo and Ren.

**ImTheBossDude:** Lyserg!

**No1Comedian:** Hahahaha!

**No1Comedian:** That was soooo funny! Lyserg, you should become a comedian!

**BritishAvenger:** -glares-

**BritishAvenger:** Anyway, Horo…

**ImTheBossDude:** I don't want to hear it…

**No1Comedian:** Awww, come on, Horo, you two would make a cool couple!

**ImTheBossDude:** That's disgusting!

**BritishAvenger:** And I think he likes you.

**ImTheBossDude:** …

**ImTheBossDude:** Really?

**No1Comedian:** Yeah, I can see the lust in his eyes every time he tries to cut your neck with his Hwan Dao!

**ImTheBossDude:** I hate you both!

**JapaneseCasanova joined the chatroom.**

**JapaneseCasanova: **Hello! Wassp?

**BritishAvenger:** -raises eyebrows-

**ImTheBossDude:** -raises eyebrows-

**No1Comedian:** -dies of laughter-

**JapaneseCasanova:** What?

**BritishAvenger:** Ryu?

**JapaneseCasanova:** Yes?

**ImTheBossDude:** -erupts in laughter-

**ImTheBossDude:** Excuse me while I puke…

**ImTheBossDude is currently busy.**

**JapaneseCasanova:** What's wrong with him?

**BritishAvenger:** Nothing.

**No1Comedian:** -laughing- Nothing.

**JapaneseCasanova:** So wassup?

**BritishAvenger:** Not much. Just trying to convince Horo to hook up with Ren.

**JapaneseCasanova:** Really? I always had the impression that Ren likes Horo…

**BritishAvenger:** Actually he does.

**JapaneseCasanova:** Does Horo know?

**BritishAvenger:** No.

**ImTheBossDude is back.**

**BritishAvenger:** It's easier that way, believe me.

**ImTheBossDude:** What is easier?

**No1Comedian:** Um…

**JapaneseCasanova:** Lyserg was telling me about the easiest way to do a cool haircut.

**BritishAvenger:** -glares-

**ImTheBossDude:** Really? I never thought of Lyserg as the trendy type…

**BritishAvenger:** -rolls eyes-

**SlackerBoy69 has joined the chatroom.**

**SlackerBoy69:** Hello, guys!

**ImTheBossDude:** Yoh! Are you still alive?!

**SlackerBoy69:** Yes, actually Anna went pretty easy on me. She broke only two of my ribs and kept me only half of hour on the electric chair!

**JapaneseCasanova: **-sweatdrop- Anyway… did any of you see Ren?

**SlackerBoy69:** Probably plotting Horo's death…

**BritishAvenger:** Again?

**BritishAvenger:** Yoh, don't you agree that Horo and Ren make a cute couple?

**SlackerBoy69:** Actually I do.

**ImTheBossDude:** What?

**No1Comedian:** Stop playing dumb, Horo!

**JapaneseCasanova: **Yeah, we know you want to get in his pants!

**No1Comedian:** Yeah, and maybe in ten years we'll see you two married, ready for Honeymoon!

**BritishAvenger:** Okay, that's a little bit too much…

**SlackerBoy69:** Yeah, and they'll argue if to go to the Ainu tribe or China!

**JapaneseCasanova: **And Horo would give up in the end and go to China!

**No1Comedian:** No, Ren would give up!

**SlackerBoy69:** No, they'd go to Miami!

**JapaneseCasanova: **China!

**No1Comedian:** Ainu tribe!

**SlackerBoy69:** Miami!

**BritishAvenger:** Why me?

**ImTheBossDude:** B-boys…

**JapaneseCasanova**: Yeah?

**No1Comedian:** What?

**SlackerBoy69:** Huh?

**BritishAvenger:** Yes?

**ImTheBossDude:** Ren called…

**ImTheBossDude:** He said he's at the electric central…

**SlackerBoy69:** And?

**ImTheBossDude:** And he has his Kwan Dao…

**No1Comedian:** And?

**JapaneseCasanova has left the chatroom.**

**ImTheBossDude:** NO!

**No1Comedian has left the chatroom.**

**SlackerBoy69: **What's happening?

**ImTheBossDude: **He cut the electricity!

**BritishAvenger has left the chatroom.**

**ImTheBossDude:** He's coming after meeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!

**SlackerBoy69 has left the chatroom.**

**ImTheBossDude:** NOOOOOOOO!!!! HEEEEEEELP!!!!!

**ImTheBossDude has left the chatroom.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Messenger madness**

**Chapter 2**

**Lyserg's _perfect_ plan…**

**A/N:** Hello all you Shaman King Fans! Here's the second chapter to my little fic! Sorry it took so much time, but this is humor and humor just needs a special mood to make it actually sound funny, so, yeah…

**Messenger IDs: **

**Yoh – SlackerBoy69 **

**Ren – ChineseShaman**

**Horohoro - ImTheBossDude**

**Hao – FutureShamanKing**

**Manta – BookWorm4U**

**Ryu – JapaneseCasanova**

**Lyserg – BritishAvenger**

**Chocolove – No1Comedian **

**Anna – YourNightmare**

**Pirika – TheGirlNextDoor**

**Tamao – SweetTamao**

**Summary: **The Shaman King characters have discovered the magic of Messenger and now they're trying to hook Horo and Ren up! God protect us all of what may happen next! HoroxRen

**SlackerBoy69 has joined the chatroom.**

**ChineseShaman has joined the chatroom.**

**SlackerBoy69:** Ren!

**ChineseShaman:** -raises eyebrows- Yes?

**SlackerBoy69:** I can't believe you cut the electricity!

**ChineseShaman:** I'm not asking you to believe me…

**ImTheBossDude has joined the chatroom.**

**ImTheBossDude:** Oh, no! He's here!

**ImTheBossDude has left the chatroom.**

**SlackerBoy69:** What's wrong with him?

**ChineseShaman:** I don't know…

**SlackerBoy69:** Ren, did you scare the shit out of him again?

**ChineseShaman: **Maybe…

**SlackerBoy69:** Oh, Ren! You know last time you did it he stood in the attic for three days, because 'Ren was trying to cut his neck with his Kwan Dao'!!!

**ChineseShaman:** Such beautiful memories!

**SlackerBoy69:** Ren!

**SlackerBoy69:** I don't want to sound like Lyserg but this has gone too far!

**SlackerBoy69:** Can't you just invite him on a date or something, like normal people do?

**ChineseShaman:** One: You do sound like Lyserg!

**ChineseShaman:** Two: I don't like Horo!

**ChineseShaman:** And three: It's much more fun this way…

**SlackerBoy69:** Answer to all three questions: My ass!

**ChineseShaman:** -glares- Excuse me?

**SlackerBoy69:** You heard me. You're right, you don't like Horo, you love him! I can bet killing him is not better than kissing him. And, not lastly, I do not sound like Lyserg!

**ChineseShaman:** -rolls eyes- Baka…

**ChineseShaman:** I have to go buy some fireworks to simulate Horo's house on fire.

**SlackerBoy69:** What?

**ChineseShaman has left the chat room.**

**SlackerBoy69:** Idiot…

**BritishAvenger has joined the chatroom.**

**BritishAvenger:** Hello, Yoh!

**SlackerBoy69:** Hi!

**BritishAvenger:** Listen, can you come to my place and give me a couple of signatures on some papers?

**SlackerBoy69**: Why? What papers?

**BritishAvenger**: I'm gathering signatures to prove Ren is insane, so I can hospitalize him in an lunatic asylum…

**SlackerBoy69**: You don't need signatures for that…

**SlackerBoy69**: Just ask him about his hobbies when surrounded by people. That would do the trick.

**BritishAvenger**: Good idea…

**SlackerBoy69**: But I don't want him in an asylum! At least not yet…

**BritishAvenger**: Why?

**SlackerBoy69**: We have to get him and Horo together!

**BritishAvenger**: Oh, no! I'm not getting involved with anything that includes Ren and Horo in the same room!

**SlackerBoy69**: Please! –Puppy dog eyes-

**BritishAvenger**: -sigh- How do I always get involved into this?

**SlackerBoy69**: Because you're our friend! –Smiles-

**BritishAvenger**: -sigh- I know…

**ImTheBossDude has joined the chatroom.**

**ImTheBossDude**: He's not here, is he?

**BritishAvenger**: No, he's not, Horo…

**SlackerBoy69**: You can come out from under the bed…

**ImTheBossDude**: It's much more secure here…

**SlackerBoy69**: Yeah, sure.

**SlackerBoy69**: Then again, better stay there and hope Ren doesn't actually burn your house…

**ImTheBossDude**: What???

**BritishAvenger**: Letting that aside…

**BritishAvenger**: You need to ask Ren an a date.

**ImTheBossDude**: Excuse me?

**ImTheBossDude**: Weren't you paying attention? Momentary he's trying to kill me!

**BritishAvenger**: And if you don't stop this, he certainly won't…

**SlackerBoy69**: Yeah, from what I see, he's actually enjoying it.

**ImTheBossDude**: -blushes- And what do you suggest I do?

**SlackerBoy69**: Invite him on a date to place where he likes.

**BritishAvenger**: Or, at least have an intelligent conversation with him…

**ImTheBossDude**: What if it doesn't work?

**SlackerBoy69**: Oh, it'll work…

**BritishAvenger**: If you know what to say it'll work…

**ChineseShaman has joined the chatroom.**

**SlackerBoy69**: Hi, Ren!

**BritishAvenger**: Hello, Ren.

**ImTheBossDude**: -trembles- I'm toast…

**ChineseShaman**: -nods in greeting-

**BritishAvenger**: Um…

**BritishAvenger**: I've promised Morphine I'd take her to a disco! Bye!

**BritishAvenger has left the chatroom.**

**SlackerBoy69**: Yeah, and Anna told me to registrate her for the ballet lessons! Bye!

**SlackerBoy69** **has left the chatroom.**

**ChineseShaman**: Disco? Ballet lessons? There two are up to something…

**ImTheBossDude**: Really? I didn't see anything abnormal at them.

**ChineseShaman**: -sigh- You're probably on their side too…

**ImTheBossDude**: AM NOT!

**ChineseShaman**: -Rolls eyes- Baka…

(After some time…)

**ImTheBossDude**: Ren…

**ChineseShaman**: Yes?

**ImTheBossDude**: Do you want to… you know… go out? I mean with me?

**ChineseShaman**: As if on a date? –raises eyebrows-

**ImTheBossDude**: No, no, no! It's not a date! Just to… you know… hang around…

**ChineseShaman**: Oh…

**ChineseShaman**: I'm a busy person…

**ChineseShaman**: I don't have time to just 'hang around'.

**ImTheBossDude**: Come on, I'll take you to the army shop and buy you any human weapon you want!

**ChineseShaman**: Tempting…

**ChineseShaman**: But no. My Kwan Dao is enough to kill anyone who stands in my way.

**ImTheBossDude**: You can say that again…

**ChineseShaman**: Did you say something?

**ImTheBossDude**: No, no, it was… the wind!

**ChineseShaman**: -rolls eyes- If you say so…

**ChineseShaman**: Now, if you excuse me, that person ringing at the door must be the postman with my fireworks.

**ImTheBossDude**: Fireworks? What fireworks?

**ChineseShaman has left the chat room.**

**SlackerBoy69 has joined the chatroom.**

**BritishAvenger has joined the chatroom.**

**JapaneseCasanova has joined the chatroom.**

**BookWorm4U has joined the chatroom.**

**No1Comedian has joined the chatroom.**

**SlackerBoy69**: How did it go?

**No1Comedian**: How did it go?

**ImTheBossDude**: What are you all doing here?

**BookWorm4U**: Asking you how your conversation with Ren went…

**ImTheBossDude**: Oh, that…

**JapaneseCasanova**: Yes, that, now tell us what happened!

**ImTheBossDude**: Well… it didn't quite work…

**SlackerBoy69**: Ahhhh!

**No1Comedian**: Nooooo!

**JapaneseCasanova**: Damn.

**BookWorm4U**: -hits his head on a table-

**BritishAvenger**: -sigh- Horo, what the hell could go wrong in this simple, perfect plan?

**ImTheBossDude**: Well, I was kind of nervous and I didn't know what to say…

**SlackerBoy69**: -sigh-

**BritishAvenger**: Desperate times ask for desperate measures.

**ImTheBossDude**: What do you mean?

**BritishAvenger**: Tomorrow afternoon you're going to invite Ren at your place to watch a movie. You have to get him drunken and sleep with him.

**ImTheBossDude**: WHAT?

**SlackerBoy69**: You have to be kidding…

**JapaneseCasanova**: -gapes-

**No1Comedian**: -dies of laughter-

**BookWorm4U**: That is disgusting…

**BritishAvenger**: I agree, but now it's the only way…

**ImTheBossDude**: Only way? I'm barely fourteen and Ren's even younger! We can't do that!

**BritishAvenger**: Listen, do you want him or not?

**ImTheBossDude**: -blushes- Yes.

**BritishAvenger**: Then you have to have him…

**ImTheBossDude**: I can't believe I'm saying this, but alright…

**BritishAvenger**: -smiles- Good. Ryu, you go buy some beer and a bottle of sake. Oh, and some popcorn.

**JapaneseCasanova**: Roger.

**JapaneseCasanova has left the chatroom.**

**BritishAvenger**: Manta, you go choose a movie Ren would like.

**BookWorm4U**: Yes, sir.

**BookWorm4U has left the chatroom.**

**BritishAvenger**: And Chocolove, you go buy some medicine, I can be sure they'll have some nasty hangovers in the morning.

**No1Comedian**: Got that, boss.

**No1Comedian has left the chatroom.**

**BritishAvenger**: And now we wait…

**ImTheBossDude**: OMG!

**SlackerBoy69**: What?

**ImTheBossDude**: My house is on fire!

**SlackerBoy69**: Now Horo, stay calm…

**ImTheBossDude**: Calm? OMG, that's Ren's maniacal laughter!

**ImTheBossDude**: He came after me again!

**ImTheBossDude**: Ahhhhhh!

**ImTheBossDude** **has left the chatroom.**

**BritishAvenger**: Not again…

**SlackerBoy69**: We'd better go help him…

**BritishAvenger**: -nods-

**SlackerBoy69 has left the chatroom.**

**BritishAvenger has left the chatroom.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Messenger madness**

**Chapter 2**

**Horo's last chance**

**A/N:** I know most of you have more than probably gave up on this fic… and yeah, I should be ashamed since I haven't updated since march… But the truth, as cruel as it is, is that I had no ideas for it… A month ago I decided to give up on it but unexpectedly my inspiration came back :) I've written most of the last chapter too, I just need to finish it and type it so you don't have to worry for another long waiting, because in three days at most I'll update it!

Hope you like it,

Helen Nayke

**Messenger IDs: **

**Yoh – SlackerBoy69 **

**Ren – ChineseShaman**

**Horohoro - ImTheBossDude**

**Hao – FutureShamanKing**

**Manta – BookWorm4U**

**Ryu – JapaneseCasanova**

**Lyserg – BritishAvenger**

**Chocolove – No1Comedian **

**Anna – YourNightmare**

**Pirika – TheGirlNextDoor**

**Tamao – SweetTamao**

**Summary: **The Shaman King characters have discovered the magic of Messenger and now they're trying to hook Horo and Ren up! God protect us all of what may happen next! HoroxRen

**SlackerBoy69 has joined the chatroom.**

**BritishAvenger has joined the chatroom.**

**SlackerBoy69: **Hi Lyserg!

**BritishAvenger: **Good morning, Yoh.

**SlackerBoy69:** Do you think they woke up? I can't wait to hear what happened last night!

**BritishAvenger: **Yoh, it's half past six in the morning…

**BritishAvenger: **No normal person wakes up at this hour, much less when they're probably dead drunk…

**SlackerBoy69: **Oh…

**SlackerBoy69: **Um, Lyserg… I'm sorry for waking you up three times last night…

**SlackerBoy69: **I couldn't sleep and I needed some company…

**BritishAvenger: **-sigh- No problem Yoh.

**BritishAvenger: **If I didn't know better I'd say you're more excited about this than Horo is…

**SlackerBoy69:** Yeah, Like that's possible…

**SlackerBoy69:** Wait a minute! Ew… Lyserg how could you say I like Ren?

**BritishAvenger: **-sigh-Stupid as a rock… as always.

**SlackerBoy69:** Hey!

**SlackerBoy69:** So… Do you think they're up?

**BritishAvenger: **Ask that one more time and you're on your own to wait for them…

**SlackerBoy69:** Oh… Okay.

**SlackerBoy69:** So…

**BritishAvenger: **Don't you dare!

**SlackerBoy69:** I was just going to ask how much alcohol Ryu bought…

**BritishAvenger: **Oh…

**BritishAvenger: **Three bottles of sake and a box of beer…

**BritishAvenger: **Through one of the sake bottles was half empty and I don't want to know where it has gone…

**SlackerBoy69: **-snickers-

**SlackerBoy69: **So…

**BritishAvenger: **-glares-

**SlackerBoy69: **I just wanted to know what movie Manta rented…

**BritishAvenger: **Oh…

**BritishAvenger: **"The Ring"… it seems like Ren's type.

**SlackerBoy69: **But, for sure, it isn't Horo's type. He'll pee in his knickers by the end of it…

**BritishAvenger: **Knickers?

**BritishAvenger: **I don't want to know where that came from…

**SlackerBoy69: **Wha… Form my mouth, of course…

**BritishAvenger:** That's not what I… Nevermind.

**SlackerBoy69: **So…

**BritishAvenger:** Horohoro you're killing me!

**BritishAvenger:** Slowly and painfully!

**FutureShamanKing has joined the chatroom.**

**BritishAvenger: **Oh thank God!

**BritishAvenger: **Whoever you are, please talk to him, he's driving me insane!

**FutureShamanKing:** Oh… Okay.

**FutureShamanKing:** Hello, otouto.

**SlackerBoy69: **Oh, hello, Hao…

**SlackerBoy69: **Wait a minute… HAO!?

**BritishAvenger: **-chokes on coffee- H-Hao????

**SlackerBoy69: **Wha… What are you doing here???

**FutureShamanKing:** -rolls eyes- Why is everyone so surprised to see me?

**SlackerBoy69:** Maybe because the person who wants to destroy the entire world has messenger…

**FutureShamanKing:** Well I have to stay informed so I need the internet.

**FutureShamanKing:** And I don't want to destroy the entire world… just the humans…

**SlackerBoy69: **That calmed us…

**FutureShamanKing:** By the way, where is your little British friend? He hasn't said anything for some time…

**SlackerBoy69:** I don't know… he's probably throwing a fit some where...

**FutureShamanKing:** -raises eyebrows-

**FutureShamanKing:** I think I'll just leave… The boredom is so thick that you could cut it with a knife…

**FutureShamanKing has left the chatroom.**

**SlackerBoy69:** Poser…

**BritishAvenger: **Where is he? Where is he? I'LL KILL HIM!

**SlackerBoy69:** He's gone, Lyserg…

**SlackerBoy69:** You can put the ax down now…

**BritishAvenger: **Damn it! I almost had him!

**SlackerBoy69:** Yeah… sure… anyway…

**BritishAvenger: **I hope you're not going to ask what I think you're going to ask…

**SlackerBoy69:** Actually…

**BritishAvenger: **Yoh… I'm going to KILL you!

**ImTheBossDude has joined the chatroom.**

**SlackerBoy69:** Horo! You're here!

**SlackerBoy69:** How did it go????

**ImTheBossDude:** Um…

**BritishAvenger:** Don't tell me you messed it up again…

**ImTheBossDude:** Well…

**BritishAvenger:** Ahhh! Damn it, Horo, can't you do anything right?

**ImTheBossDude:** Hey!

**ImTheBossDude:** Anyway, your brilliant plan had a little BIG flaw, Lyserg…

**SlackerBoy69:** What flaw?

**ImTheBossDude:** Ren has probably never drunk alcohol in his life…

**ImTheBossDude:** After the second beer he was so drunk he was giggling like a girl… quite disturbing actually...

**ImTheBossDude:** Five minutes later he was on the couch, snoring so loud he could wake up the dead…

**SlackerBoy69:** …

**BritishAvenger:** I can't believe it…

**SlackerBoy69:** Me either…

**SlackerBoy69:** You mean Ren snores?

**BritishAvenger: **No, you idiot!

**BritishAvenger:** It didn't work! The goddamn plan didn't work!

**SlackerBoy69: **Hey! You don't have to insult me for that!

**BritishAvenger:** I'm ruined… never has a plan back fired on me… I'm so ashamed…

**ImTheBossDude:** Snap out of it, Lyserg!

**SlackerBoy69: **Yeah, don't become sinucidal!

**BritishAvenger:** Excuse me?

**ImTheBossDude:** Damn! Ren stirred in his sleep! I hope he doesn't wake up!

**SlackerBoy69: **Is he still snoring?

**BritishAvenger:** Wait a minute… Where are you, Horo?

**ImTheBossDude:** At the computer, duh!

**ImTheBossDude: **Jeez, Lyserg, I thought you were smarter than this!

**BritishAvenger:** No, you idiot!

**BritishAvenger:** At whose computer are you?

**ImTheBossDude: **Ren's.

**SlackerBoy69:** But I thought you watched the movie at your place, Horo…

**ImTheBossDude:** We did.

**BritishAvenger:** Then what's Ren's computer doing at your house?  
**ImTheBossDude:** Beats me… Ren thought it was necessary to bring his laptop to my house…

**SlackerBoy69: **But that's not fair!

**SlackerBoy69:** Ren tried to break a couple of my ribs when I asked if I could play at it…

**SlackerBoy69:** How come le let you? –pout-

**BritishAvenger:** He's sleeping, dummy…

**SlackerBoy69:** Oh, yeah, I forgot…

**SlackerBoy69:** Hey, I'm not dumb!

**BritishAvenger:** -rolls eyes- And my hair's not green…

**SlackerBoy69:** Hey, Horo, did you search his computer?

**SlackerBoy69:** Does he have porn?

**ImTheBossDude:** Yeah, but the git's put a password on it…

**ImTheBossDude:** I'm still trying to decode it…

**BritishAvenger:** Don't you two think of anything else?

**SlackerBoy69:** Um… no.

**ImTheBossDude:** Nope…

**BritishAvenger:** -rolls eyes-

**BritishAvenger:** Anyway…

**BritishAvenger:** Listen, Horo, this is your last chance to win Ren over…

**ImTheBossDude:** Who says I still want him?

**SlackerBoy69:** Dude, sometimes you're such and idiot…

**ImTheBossDude:** Look who's talking.

**BritishAvenger:** Horo, shut up and listen to me NOW!

**ImTheBossDude:** Or what?

**BritishAvenger:** Or I'll tell Ren myself, because this is driving me insane!

**SlackerBoy69:** Yeah, me too!

**BritishAvenger:** You shut up!

**BritishAvenger:** You're the other reason I'm going insane!

**SlackerBoy69:** -pout-

**ImTheBossDude:** Alright, alright, I give up!

**ImTheBossDude:** How are you going to torture me this time?

**BritishAvenger:** You are going to wait for him to wake up and tell him the whole goddamn truth!

**SlackerBoy69:** I thought we tried that once…

**SlackerBoy69:** And it didn't have the expected results…

**BritishAvenger:** This is your last chance, Horo!

**BritishAvenger:** If you don't tell him this time I will!

**BritishAvenger:** And don't expect me to be gentle!

**ImTheBossDude:** I see you guys really want to kill me…

**ImTheBossDude:** Ren tried to kill me twice in the last couple of days and now you're sending me to imminent death!

**SlackerBoy69:** Oh, don't be so melodramatic, Ren!

**ImTheBossDude:** Melodramatic?!

**ImTheBossDude:** If there is something worse than an angry Ren that's an angry Ren with a hangover!

**BritishAvenger:** Okay, so I'll drop by to Ren's house in a couple of hours?

**ImTheBossDude:** NO!!!

**ImTheBossDude:** Alright, you green haired freak, I'll tell him!

**BritishAvenger:** Not so fast!

**ImTheBossDude:** -groan- What now?

**SlackerBoy69:** Is there more, Lyserg?

**BritishAvenger:** -smirk-

**BritishAvenger:** Activate Ren's microphone so we'll hear your conversation.

**ImTheBossDude:** Whaaaaaaat????

**SlackerBoy69:** Lyserg, you're a genius!

**ImTheBossDude:** But Lyserg! Don't you trust me?

**BritishAvenger:** Not one bit…

**ImTheBossDude:** I can't believe you.

**BritishAvenger:** Oh, and close the monitor so the computer will look like it's shut down.

**ImTheBossDude:** Alright, alright…

**SlackerBoy69:** Horo, I know you don't want to wake Ren up, but nobody is THAT quiet…

**BritishAvenger:** That's because he didn't open the microphone, did you, Horo?

**ImTheBossDude:** Damn you, Lyserg, you and your witty mind!

**BritishAvenger:** -smirks-

**-Microphone- **

**Horo: **-whisper- Is it better now?

**-Microphone- **

**BritishAvenger:** Perfect!

**SlackerBoy69:** This is going to b fun!

**ImTheBossDude:** For you

**-Microphone- **

**Ren:** -sleepy- What's that noise? Horo, where the hell are you, baka?

**-Microphone- **

**ImTheBossDude:** Oh, dear! He's up!

**BritishAvenger:** Close the monitor!

**SlackerBoy69:** Good luck, Horo!

**ImTheBossDude:** I'll need more than just luck to get out of this one…

**A/N:** The next (and final) chapter will be the conversation between Horo and Ren heard by the others. Please review and tell me what you thought of this chapter!


	4. Chapter 4

**Messenger madness**

**Chapter 2**

**Horo's not so happy ending…**

**A/N:** I'm so proud of myself! I have never updated o fic so quickly! And, in my opinion, this is the funniest chapter (I hope)! I'm thinking about writing a sequel, I even have the idea, but I dunno how it will end up or it will be as funny as this one… So, if you liked this fic, watch out, cause there might be another one!

**Messenger IDs: **

**Yoh – SlackerBoy69 **

**Ren – ChineseShaman**

**Horohoro - ImTheBossDude**

**Hao – FutureShamanKing**

**Manta – BookWorm4U**

**Ryu – JapaneseCasanova**

**Lyserg – BritishAvenger**

**Chocolove – No1Comedian **

**Anna – YourNightmare**

**Pirika – TheGirlNextDoor**

**Tamao – SweetTamao**

**Summary: **The Shaman King characters have discovered the magic of Messenger and now they're trying to hook Horo and Ren up! God protect us all of what may happen next! HoroxRen

**-Microphone-**

**Ren:** -sleepy- What's that noise? –yawn- Horo, where the hell are you, baka?

**-running-**

**Horo: **I'm here, Ren!

**Ren:** What was that sound?

**Horo:** -alarmed- Um… The toilet flush!

**Ren:** Oh… Why does my head hurts so much?

**Horo:** -too fast- I have no idea! Why would I know why your head hurts?

**Ren:** That was a rhetorical question, you baka…

**Horo:** Re-to-li-car? Right…

**Ren:** -sigh- Baka…

**Horo:** -unsure- Um… would you like a tea or something?

**Ren:** A big coffee… and a fist of aspirins, if you don't mind…

**Horo:** S-sure…

**-footsteps exiting the room- **

**Ren:** -annoyed- What a baka… How could one like me like an idiot like him? Uh… I'm getting weak… Yuck! And I have morning breath! Wait a minute… I smell of… HOROHORO!!!

**-an unmistakable clinquet of the Kwan Dao-**

**-footsteps running into the room-**

**Horo:** What happened, Ren?

**Ren:** -outraged- You got me DRUNK!

**Horo:** -panic stricken- No! I-I didn't! What a-are you t-talking about?

**Ren:** -yelling- DON'T LIE TO ME! –forced calm- I have never drunk alcohol in my life! And now I wake up with a hangover and smelling of sake! –yelling- What is your EXCUSE???

**Horo:** I didn't get you drunk! I swear! You did it yourself!

**Ren:** -yelling- EXCUSE ME?!

**-angry footsteps-**

**Horo:** No! Don't get close with that bloody Kwan Dao of yours! Ahhh!!!

**-running around the room-**

**Horo:** Ren… -pant- …hear me out… -pant- …or at least…-pant- …stop chasing me!!!

**-the running stopped abruptly- **

**Ren:** Very well. But you better make it good or you won't live to see another of those unhealthy hamburgers!

**Horo:** I… I…

**-a few seconds of silence-**

**Ren:** You have no excuse!

**-a couple of steps-**

**Horo:** No, Ren, don't come closer! I have an excuse! I really do!

**Ren:** Well, let's hear it, then!

**Horo:** -uncharacteristically high-pinched- I wanted to… I… you know… I…

**Ren:** WHAT?! You got me drunk so you could rape me! I'LL KILL YOU!!!

**Horo:** No! Ren, don't! Aaaahhhh!!!

**-more running around the room-**

**-the sound of tripping, falling hard on the floor and glass breaking- **

**Ren:** Mwahahahaha! Now I've caught you!

**Horo:** -desperate- No, Ren, don't do this! You'll hate yourself for it later!

**Ren:** -madly calm- Quite the contrary. All my problems will be gone once I get rid of you!

**Horo:** Nooo! Reeen!!!

**-the sound of the Kwan Dao hitting the floor then silence-**

**Horo:** Am I still alive? R-Ren? What are you doing on the floor too?

**Ren:** Uh… My head hurts… All that running has made it spin again…

**Horo:** -panic-stricken- I'll… I'll get some aspirins…

**-running out of the room-**

**-someone popping down the bed-**

**Ren:** Uh! That baka! I'll kill him once my head stops spinning!

**-running into the room-**

**Horo:** -pant- Here're some aspirins… -pant- And your coffee… -pant-

**Ren:** -barely audible- Thank you…

**-a minute of silence-**

**Horo:** Um… Ren, can I sit on the bed too?

**Ren:** You shouldn't ask me, it's you bed…

**Horo:** Oh…

**-someone popping down the bed-**

**-awkward silence-**

**Horo and Ren at the same time:** I've got to tell you something!

**-a couple of seconds of silence-**

**Horo and Ren at the same time:** You first!

**-if blushing had a sound, this would certainly be it-**

**Horo:** You first, Ren…

**Ren:** Uh… Okay… I… um… I… -quickly- You forgot to put milk in my coffee!

**Horo:** -confused- No, I didn't! Are you blind?

**Ren:** O-oh… You're right…

**-awkward silence-**

**Ren:** Your turn…

**Horo:** My turn for what?

**Ren:** You said you had something to tell me, baka!

**Horo:** Oh… I… I forgot…

**Ren:** You what? Baka! Can't you do anything right? You're wasting my precious t- Mph-mph-mph! Mmmmm…

**-sound of snogging-**

**-a couple of loud moans-**

**-Microphone-**

**SlackerBoy69:** Ewww!

**SlackerBoy69:** That's nasty!

**BritishAvenger:** At least Horo had the guts to tell him at last…

**BritishAvenger:** If that could even be counted as telling.

**SlackerBoy69:** Do you think it's over now?

**BritishAvenger:** I certainly hope so…

**BritishAvenger:** I don't think I can take another day of this…

**-Microphone- **

**-the kissing stopped-**

**-silence-**

**Ren:** What were those noises?

**Horo:** What noises?

**Ren:** Don't play dumb! Those sounded like… receiving messages sounds! From messenger!

**Horo:** I'm sure you imagined it!

**Ren:** I did not!

**Horo:** Ren, put that bloody thing down!

**-footsteps coming closer-**

**Horo:** NO! Ren, that's my computer! Nooo!

**-smashing metal and plastic-**

**Ren:** There! That's what you get for interrupting us!

**Horo:** M-my poor computer! You killed it! It had no fault! It wasn't even opened!

**Ren:** What do you… Oh no! YOU! You opened my COMPUTER! I'LL KILL YOU!

**Horo:** NO! Don't come closer!

**-pause-**

**Horo:** Um… Ren? Why did you pass me? What are you doing there? Ren, that's you computer! Wait!

**-evil laugh- **

**-Microphone-**

**ImTheBossDude has left the chatroom.**

**BritishAvenger:** Not again!

**SlackerBoy69:** This is the worst luck ever!

**BritishAvenger:** You should have shut up!

**SlackerBoy69:** Me?!

**BritishAvenger:** You started it!

**SlackerBoy69:** …

**SlackerBoy69:** Look at the bright side…

**BritishAvenger:** What bright side?

**SlackerBoy69:** At least Horo confessed…

**SlackerBoy69:** And maybe once Ren calms down he'll ask him out.

**BritishAvenger:** If Horo survives, that is…

**SlackerBoy69:** Good point.

**SlackerBoy69:** Let's go and try to save him.

**BritishAvenger:** -sigh- Alright…

**BritishAvenger:** Here we go again.

**SlackerBoy69 has left the chatroom.**

**BritishAvenger has left the chatroom.**

**A/N: **Well, That was it, folks! I know it ended kind of abrupt, but with Ren's temper I doubt he's become immediately all sappy and romantic. And I wanted it to end with a funny thing (at least in my opinion it's funny, lol). But I'm not one to decide that… You have to tell me that! So, press the review button and tell me what you thought of this whole crazy and random fic! Pretty please with sugar on top! –bats eyelashes-


End file.
